HEY, I'M LAUREN.

I'm the person that parks all the way in the back of the parking lot, slips on ice 15 seconds later, and justifies it all being worth not getting a door-ding over.

I'm the person that parks all the way in the back of the parking lot, slips on ice 15 seconds later, and justifies it all being worth not getting a door-ding over.

RANDOM YET RELEVANT FACTS:

  • In 2006, I waited four hours outside of a Best Buy to get Kanye West's autograph only to have a horrific coughing fit in front of him. I've learned to live with the look he gave me.

  • I love walking long distance at night. There's something about constantly fearing for your life that puts an extra spring in your step.

  • In another life I would open a used car dealership catered to the needs of sentimental sellers. 

  • I survived a scarring 3 A.M. paranormal experience at a Super 8 in southern Indiana. Give me a chair, 10 minutes of your time, and you'll be sure to sleep with the lights on for a month.